Nick N: Oh it’s good…. It’s really good…..
Kattni: I’m not going to finish my sentence in case anything I say somehow plays into that….

Jules: How did you see that? Gold against beige… How did you possibly see that,.
Josh T: Those are his two favorite colors.
Jules: I couldn’t see it… Or are you just used to looking at little pricks. …. I’m sorry, I had to…
Nick N: It’s alright. Everybody gets one.
Jules: And I just spent my one.
Nick N: That’s what she said!

He’s just so brilliantly stupid. - Kattni

Chris: I made her the cutest gift ever. Really.
Sam: It’s bad.
Chris C: No, it’s the best. Any girl would love this. She was here the other day and she loves taking pictures because she’s a crazy photographer person, so I put her camera on a stansion and we sat in front of the xmas tree and we took a picture.
Kattni: Oh god.
Chris C: So I took it home and cropped it all nice, printed it on photo paper…
Kattni: And made her a construction paper picture frame?
Sam: You’re close
Chris C: no POPSICLE STICKS.
Kattni: You’re kidding.
Chris C: No, listen. I put them together. I cut up a Lucky Charms box to use for the backing because she likes Lucky Charms…
Sam: Because that makes sense…
Chris C: No really, it needs a backing…
Kattni: I love how you’re justifying the fact that the frame needs a backing and not that you used a Lucky Charms box because she likes it…
Chris C: Then I drew on it… There’s a wreath in one corner and some holly in the other. and I took pipe cleaners, and bent them and made it into an ornament!
Sam: Because she’s going to want to hang that on the xmas tree when she’s living with her boyfriend’s parents.
Kattni: So… she’s living with her boyfriend’s parents?
Chris C: Ex. … And him.
Kattni: Yea, you’re definitely going to get with her while she’s living with her ex-boyfriend and his parents.
Chris C: No, check this out… The first time we kissed she had been with him 3 days before…
Kattni: Hah. You’re getting sloppy seconds.
Chris C: Ew!
Sam: You better hope he doesn’t have anything!
….
Chris C: That reminds me. This kid’s pretty gross. Nobody likes him…

Sam: No offense, but you brought her in and I thought she was a 12 year old girl.
Chris C: *grins* hehehehahahha….
Sam: Oh god.
Chris C: 4chan is the best website ever…. No, I’m kidding… I swear.

Kattni: Lately these things have been coming with these screws loose, so I have to screw them or it won’t slide in right…
Nick: ….hehehahahaha….
Kattni: Nice.

Yea. That’s good. Because that wouldn’t all fit in that bag. - David

see normally I would make a parenthetical after that
but no punctuation so
man this lack of punctuation is cramping my style - Matt S

‘iPod headphones hanked’…… Hanked?…… Hanked……..? - Josh T

Josh T: There’s nothing wrong with being a manwhore.
Kattni: Oh I totally agree.
Josh T: Yea… That term has been thrown around at me lately…
Kattni: Awww… Really?.. How come I haven’t been getting any of that…

Kaitlin: I have to go get my cat…
Josh T: You have a cat?
Kaitlin: Yes I have a cat. It lives with Adam. I don’t want that girl touching my cat.
Josh T: Don’t swing that way?

I never saw him the same since the night I watched him try to drink the huffer. - Josh T

Kaitlin: We went to the ballet!
Josh T: That was… ultimately… the worst thing you could tell me.
Kaitlin: He liiiiiiked it.
Josh T: I will rip him a new one.
Kattni: Hey, Nick… Did you buy your tights yet?
Josh T: So… You like to watch men jumping around in tights?
Kattni: Did you buy tickets to the nut… cracker… yet?

Josh T: The back door.. some of them rattle.
Kattni: Back door.
Josh T: Yes. The back door. Oh… ‘access door’. And that… does not sound… that much better… back access door. But, yea. If you set it flat and press on the top, you hear a rattle. *taptaptap* You hear rattle. *taptaptap* Rattle…. Rattle in the back… Anyway… there’s a little rattle… replace the back door.

Josh: I forgot my phone….
Kattni: What?
Josh T: I forgot my phone.
Kattni: I thought you said ‘bowl’ and I was thinking, dude, at work?
Josh T: Yea… the backdoor rattles.

Did you just say ‘center for gonorrhea’? - Jay T

What is that guy listening to? - David

Yeeaaayy!… Couldn’t have sounded more feminine. - Jay T

*into the walkie* Hey Mike, that iTunes is done. …. ……. Maybe you didn’t hear me because I didn’t say ‘Over’. - Jay T

Rich: This is not gives for him…
Kattni: What did you just say?
Rich: I’m looking at Pottery Barn. They sent me an email with beer glasses and they have a ‘gifts for him’ section…
Kattni: I thought you said ‘gifts for hoes’.
Rich: Now, that would be good. Studded collar… with a chain hanging off of it…
Jay T: Anti-bacterial soap…

Yes, I leak. My water broke. And I’m not allowed to leave… Because of attendance… - Rich

I never fired a family member for being 15 minutes late to Thanksgiving dinner. - Rich

Kattni: It kills me that this version is one seventh the size of the previous version.
Rich: Compression.
Kattni: Yea… Turns out Windows 7 is the first version of windows in ages to be smaller than the previous version. Evidently it’s not quite as massively bloated as the rest.
Rich: Now, wait, give them a chance, they haven’t released it yet. XP was a little light in the loafers before it was released…
Kattni: ‘Light in the loafers’.. Brilliant.
Rich: Yea… That really isn’t the phrase I should have used… But they took the time to make it more and more bloated. Ah.. it was anemic…

She was really smart. - Jay T

Is Will showing the new hires ‘Horton Hears A Who’? - Rich

I don’t care what job you go to, where, what kind… There’s always a Jeremy. Some places have two… See unfortunately two Jeremys aren’t like antimatter… They don’t collide and cancel each other… They feed off each other. It just gets worse. - Rich

It works! - Jay T

Kattni: Who is out there squealing?
Rich: I don’t know.
Kattni: Actually, don’t answer that.
Rich: Well… I promise it’s not me.
From outside the door: *wheeeeeeeeee!!*
Rich: That might have been me.

All it says is leopard install question mark. - Jay T

Gah! I hate that. … Oh. That’s why that’s not working… I hate that too. - Jay T

Jay T: Do you think I’d make a good manager?
Kattni: Well, yea. But I think you’re a bit forward.
Jay T: Well, so is Brian.
Kattni: Very true.
Jay T: Yea.. I’d have to cool it…
Rich: HEY. … Cool it.

I call dibs on the pencil stache. - Kattni

Jay T: (on phone) Is your computer in front of you?.. Does it have a purple splash background?.. Then yes, you have Leopard. Ok. (hangs up)
Kattni: ‘Does it hurt when you pee? Then, yes you have gonorrhea.’

Easiest phone call.. On this pink piece of paper… That I’ve ever had to make. - Jay T

This says ‘South Texas Trophy Whitetail Hunts’ and I read it as ‘Sex Trophy Whitetail Hunts’ and I’m thinking, whaaat? - Kattni

Foster home this! - Joe E

Kattni: I need sweets or snacks or something. What should I do.
Joe E: I have an um…. cough drop that might have sugar coating on it.
Kattni: That’s disgusting, but thank you.
Melissa: They’re actually pretty good… I had a piece of cake if it makes you feel any better.
Joe E: You’re an air!
Kattni and Melissa: …..

Kattni: David… David….. Did you see the boots?
David: Yes. Not happy. Not happy…

You guys think you had good days today? I fuckin’ helped out Jesus. - Rich

Ed: I’m asking him for help with stripping down my crib… I’ve never sanded and varnished anything before.
Rich: And I’m telling him I have no idea.
Kattni: Right here.
Ed: Stripping, I know… But we’re talking about wood-work here…

Ed: Soccer is just a bunch of grown men in shorts kicking a ball.
Jay T: Basketball’s a bunch of grown men in shorts… bouncing a ball…
Ed: I’ll watch a real sport dude. Pro wrestling.
Jay T: A bunch of grown men in tights groping each other?

My belt… and this chair… Make a great fart noise. So when you’re in a real serious moment… And Brian’s yelling at you… *pbbbbbt* … It wasn’t me. - Jay T

I said it, and Rich says, ‘It sounds like C3P0 telling stories to the Ewoks.’ And then he does it, and I’m all, holyshit it does… - Jay T

Kattni: What did you say….? Did you just say ‘ass worship’?
Jay T: Yes. It said Ass Worship. Number one movie. … Wait. Did that really come from their library?
Nick R: Yes. That’s why I stopped, just transferred it all to the desktop and said ‘you can just put it where it needs to go’.

Melissa: Can you help a brotha out..?
Rich: Is he really a brother?
Melissa: No. It’s just what we say when my dog .. loses his balls.

I think that’s Jay’s giant pen, actually. - Kattni

Rich: Everyone I graduated with is turning 30 this year and my friend is the first one out of the gate, so we went and played whirlyball last night.
Jay T: So you’re sore?
Rich: Yea… Just below the waist.

Jay T: wtf. People need to pick up their fricking computers.
Kattni: I know, seriously. I had to get on the chair and rearrange everything. Why don’t you get on a chair and move some stuff to the top shelf…
Jay T: Ernh… I like puzzles…

I think Google has a lot of money…. I’m not sure… But I think so… - Jay T

Jay T: I wonder what Crystal’s now… Think she’s working at Gamestop?
Kattni: Think she got her driver’s license?
Jay T: She didn’t have a driver’s license? And she was still late all the time?
Kattni: Yea, her mom dropped her off.
Jay T: Are you kidding me…. “Thanks mom!”

Kattni: Totally escaped the comically long screwdriver elbow.
Jay T: It’s like tennis elbow.

I think it’s because you can twirl it.. like a sword. *chwpp* - Jay T

Kattni: Is Tack opening all the boxes?
Jay T: I don’t know.
Kattni: … Is Rich licking all the parts?

Kattni: I was like, wait a minute….
Jay T: ‘Rich IS licking the parts.’

Can I get a balloon and rub it on your head? - David

Actually, I might have a picture of a pork hot dog on that drive… We might not want to do that. - Rich

Kaitlin: There’s a double standard for everything. There are a ton of things that it’s not ok for concierge to do, but everyone else can.
Rich:… Like lead geniuses?

I think Paul just called me a fatty. - Kaitlin

Josh T: I don’t understand why this part won’t come in.
Kattni: Because we are a round hole and it is square.
Josh T: Oooh. Sounds painful.

This logic board isn’t even in the static bag. It’s taped at this end… But not so much at this end. - Nick N

Kattni: We just happened to have the parts.
Nick: That’s because we keep ordering them and never eating them.
Kattni: Ordering them and not eating them?
Nick N: Needing them.
Josh T: He said eating.
Kattni: You said eating. see?

Kattni: Is it right.
Nick N: It’s fine. Could use a little more sugar. I’ll just have her put her finger in there and stir it up.
Josh: wuuuugghh….

Jay T: I got a naked… Uh…. Naked…
Nick N: Please finish that sentence…
Jay T: Attachment?

Nichole: I hate when people are at the bar and on their phones and don’t talk to me.
David: Maybe you should be more interesting.

Ed: What do you want.
Jay T: I work here.

Nick N: I like screws!
Kattni and Josh: Hehehehe…heh…
Nick N: That’s not even funny. There’s no way of misinterpreting that.

Rich: (to his puppy) No, you can’t go in there. You’re not ESD safe.

I didn’t mean it! I swear, I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean it… - Girl working the register at Flamers after she ignored Josh for a while not realising he wanted to order

Kattni: That was odd.. That girl saying “I didn’t mean it!” .. What kind of response is that to not realising you wanted to order. I mean… Does your boss beat you..?
Josh T: And turns out I don’t even care. As long as I get my food.

Kattni…… Sometimes you’re silly. - Nick N

I don’t know if Rich.. licks the logic boards before he puts them in… But it seems like he’s always getting the bad boards. - Jay T

I was like, wait. I must have missed a letter or something…… Nope. That’s what it said. - Nick N

It’s been emptied. Who empties our trash can in the middle of the day. Oh there it is… ohhhh that was a kleenix. - Nick N.

Nick N: I was looking for the part this morning, and I found it, and the box was already opened…
Jay T: And Rich already had licked it…

Yea. I was looking around for parts and was finding them and, they’re all open! And I said, Rich is opening them, licking them and putting them back… - Nick

Wouldn’t be it amazing if he was? “Brian, can we see the video of the GR?” He probably does all shifty eyes first… - Jay T

It’s like dang, you’re supposed to breathe air once in a while… - Jules

Hey… Thanks for telling me about the employee appreciation dinner. I just saw the flyer. - David

Yea, I know. My name goes on forever. My mom’s like, you’ll hate me when you’re married. I’m like, why… - Girl at Partridge Creek

Kattni: It is the man’s hour!
Jay: That was a good show. Oh wait, it was the Man Show.

Josh T: Oh god. Are you drunk?
Jay T: Chuck Norris’ fist under this beard…. Yes.

Nick: Then the laptop probably shot fire out the back.
Kattni: Those were jet engines, not fire. He tricked it out.

Damn. Put him on a cart and you’ve got muzak. - Kattni

Nick N: WHAT.
Josh T: I said nothing.josh
Nick N: It was the way you said it….

Josh T: Just because I think half the people I work with are shit-heads… And the other half…
Nick N: Are me?

Woah, that’s not supposed to do that. - Nick N.

Todd: How… On a PC, would you find out if you have a wireless card.
Nick N: Connect to a wireless network?

“Networked.” They’re having sex. - Nick N

I get up in the morning, whatever they put in the cup, I take it. - Todd

Kind of like Stephan yesterday. He’s the one that gave us a promoter letter and referred to me as the ‘cute boy who brought his computer out’. “The cute boy with the green hair,” or something. And I’m like, that’s meeee! I’m the cute boy! He says, “Are you the one who did the repair?” And I said, I think everyone had their hands in this one.” And he’s like, “Ooooh…” - Nick N

Nick N: I thought I was funny for a second but then I realised I wasn’t…
Kattni: I’m glad you’re making progress.
Nick N: …so I stopped.

Yea. I’ll flip my D. - Jay T

Nap nap nappity nap-nap. - Nick N

Megan: Just open the door, there’s some snow to knock out of there…
Chris C: Fake snow!?
Megan: Just don’t inhale it… you don’t need a mask or anything.
Kattni whisper to Josh: Just the concept of telling Coleman to not inhale seems like an epic failure from the start…

Kattni: Who’s a viking.
Rich: The viking.
Jay T: I was going to say ‘your mom’, but I don’t know her. She might really wear a horn hat and then I would have offended you.

I would say thanks for your compassion but we all know you don’t have any. - Kattni

Kattni: You got undies in there…
Kaitlin: What…
Kattni: Skivvies… got some unmentionables in there…
Kaitlin: What..?
Kattni: Underwear. I was making a joke. You have a shopping bag, I was asking if you had underwear in it.
Kaitlin: Hah! I totally do, actually… And a shirt.
Chris C: …. Wow… what?!

What do you need the four-to-four for… wtf. Four to four for for. - Kattni

The term spudger describes a general class of tool used for poking. - Jay T

Josh T: I fucking hate calling these fucking deadbeats.
Kattni: You fucking hate Coleman and his fucking hippies? What?
Josh T: No… fucking hate calling these fucking deadbeats… wtf.

Kattni: What, are you talking to Dr. Sbaitso?
Rich: Hah. I was just thinking about that. How are you feeling. Tell me about your dreams. Cursing at me will not solve the problem. … Fuck you too.

Kattni: I mean, what. Did the guy work at a huge apple orchard in Chicago and said he was the “lead tech” at “the Apple” and the guy somehow connected that?
Rich: He knows everything about making cider. And he makes a meean pie.

Kattni: Oh wait. That’s not my box… That’s your box.
Rich: Yes. Keep your hands out of my box.
Kattni: You sure about that?
Rich: And I’ll do the same.
Josh T: Niccce…
Rich: …. My wife’s not here is she…?

Rich: I thought I saw Jay walking around with it.
Nick N: Haha… Jay-walking.

Josh T: Nick’s in one of those moods today. I’m going to have to knock him down a couple of notches.
Rich: Be careful with that, he’s already pretty small.

It only happened once… - Rich

Can I fix your I pod I’m really good at fixing iPods I’m not wearing any underwear. - Rich

I think Little Miss Military Base was lying. - Josh T

Kattni: Is that…
Nick: Yes.
Kattni: hahahahahahahahahah…
Rich: What.
Kattni: Haha…
Rich: You can’t get a joke like that and not tell me, come on now.
Kattni: Hahahaha
Nick: Little bit of peanut butter. yea.
Rich: Oh….
Kattni: See…. I knew I didn’t have to tell you… just give him a minute, he’ll give it up every time…
Rich: That’s not saying much.

She said you guys, like, put it under another name… Is that like, code or something? - Guy at Partridge Creek

Josh T: Crayap.
Rich: What?
Josh T: Crayap.
Rich: Crip?
Josh T: Crayap.
Rich: As opposed to Blood?
Josh T: Crayap.
Rich: Oh. ‘Crap’.
Kattni: Wait, as opposed to Blood… Rich, that’s pretty epic that you even knew that.
Rich: You know, kiss my white ass.

Oh, jeez. There goes Coleman again. - Josh

Josh: Hey Rich. How long do you think this pile of pens will stay… a pile of pens.
Rich: Are we doing a countdown?
Kattni: I think we should take squares… except make it by the hour.

Rich: Who in this day names their child Felix.
Kattni: Evidently this dude. .. ’s parents.

Troldrik: Poor John, soon no more Harper.
John M: I do say, you’re more up on canoobian politiks than me.
Troldrik: Yes well… you must install some more wiretaps in parliament then, to keep up.

Chris S: Welp… Wonderful. I have “enforced” vacation from Dec 20 - Jan 4. Fuckers.
John M: Oh noes.
Kattni: Hm.
John M: Please don’t make me take xmas off!

More cranks required for Partridge creek store. - Dave

Dave: I like what we did with the iPhone. Since we couldn’t get the headphones to fit. Because you don’t need headphones to use an iPhone.
Kattni: Nope.
Dave: I like it. He could be using it to.. find out where the elves are.
Kattni: GPS trackers.
Dave: He’s right there. That’s where he is.

Kattni: It’s nice to see you on your knees.
Dave: Yea, it’s a good place to be.

Kattni: It’s because it hasn’t gotten enough of the special.
Dave: Yea, can always use more of the special.
Kattni: Little bit.

Josh T: You’re doing it wrong.
Kattni: I know, they’re so tiny.
Josh T: You have such tiny girl farts!

Oh.. I just let.. A little one.. sorry. - Josh T

Nothing in your face on the floor. - Kattni

Kattni: I ran into a friend form a long time ago
Rich: You ran into a broom?
Kattni: No I ran into a friend…. Ran into a broom a long time ago?
Rich: I thought maybe you ran into a broom that gave you an injury that hurts sometimes…

Mike: It’s the downtown hotel.
Mark: Downtown Goodrich?

Jenn: Yea… I got kicked out of catholic school. I got caught kissing my boyfriend in the confession booth.
Mike: Father who?

Carol: Mr. Domerath. But everyone called him “Bud”…. And he was having an affair with one of my sister’s girlfriends was in 10th grade. And I think his wife knew about it, but decided to just turn the other cheek. But anyway, he would have all of us over. And I said , “Hey mom, I’m going over to Mr. Domerath’s house to study.”
Mike: She turned the other cheek..
Carol: She’d be, “Okay.” so we would go over to Mr. Domerath’s house, and smoke pot
Mike: BUD.
Carol: And we would do whatever the hell we wanted there.
Mike: IT’S BUD.
Carol: In an a-frame in Keego Harbor. You know, and stay until we weren’t drunk anymore anymore, and weren’t stoned…
Mike: PASS ME THE BUD.
Carol: And then go home…
Mike: WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING.
Carol: And just go over there all the time. To Bud’s house.
Mike: BUD.

Mark: Did any of you have Mr. Wheatley in work? And he’d bring in his bobcat to school. Just to mess around. He’s out in the parking lot with it.
Carol: Bobcat? Like…
Mark: Like the little scooper thing.
Carol: Not a pet bobcat?
Mike: No, we’re talking like excavation equipment.
Mark: Yea, excavation equipment.
Carol: A pet bobcat would have been just as reasonable.
Mark: Would have been pretty cool too.
Jenn: Where do you get one of those?
Carol: A pet bobcat?
Jenn: Yeeaaa. I want one!
Mike: E-bay.
Carol: You can get anything you want on the internet.
Mark: Or you could make friends with Putin and get a tiger. Did you hear about Putin’s birthday present?
Carol: Didn’t he give a wild cat or something?
Mark: Yea, a tiger.
Jenn: I want to be his friend sooo bad.

You know what I heard for the first time at Mr. Domerath’s house… Tommy. The whooole thing. - Carol

Jenn: This is not Madonna. It’s just wrong.
Mike: Wait, what?
Jenn: This song is sung by Madonna.
Mike: That’s what I thought you said. Yea.
….
Kattni: Oh my god you’re right.
Jenn: I told you!
Kattni: What the fuck.
Mike: Anyone hear the ratings on her motor city show?
Kattni: I’m picturing this kid in a v-neck sweater and a bowl cut with a guitar.. on a stool and doing this number while he’s singing it..
Mark: And some jock coming up and punching him in the face.

It’s like OH LOL EVERYTHING’S ON SALE. - Kattni

Yea, she shoved her headphones into the USB port. And she’s sitting there, “What happened? Why aren’t my headphones working? I plugged them in and they won’t work!” And he said, “I couldn’t help myself.” “You have put the round peg into the square hole.” And not only that, she ruined the motherboard by doing it. And he was just sitting there, shaking his head, going, you know, there’s a little picture of the headphones by the port! And wouldn’t you think, as you were trying to shove your headphone jack into your USB port, that how come this is not going in here properly… wouldn’t somewhere along the line there would be some sort of fail safe mechanism that would stop you from doing this? - Carol

So my car will NOT light on fire. - Jenn

Unless I’m on my way home from Defcon, in which case they’re gunna go, ‘Yea. You don’t know what happened to it.’ - Kattni

Jenn: You know, we came home from Denmark, and we stopped in Amsterdam for the fiftyth millionth time. And my passport was checked and I was actually completely traumatised. Cus like, they scan it, and it comes up on a computer screen and it says everywhere you’ve been in and out of the country.
Kattni: Oh woops.
Jenn: I know, I’m sitting there.. I didn’t think we were even going to get through security to be honest. They put this big orange sticker on my passport.. And they’re like, “You need to step over here…”
Mark: They didn’t even want to talk to us at the same time.
Kattni: Well of course, they need to separate you.
Jenn: And then they asked questions like, “Who packed your luggage.” “Who the hell do you think packed my luggage. Do I look like I have a butler?” And then he’s like…
Mike: “Some guy at the bus stop.”
Jenn: Yea, he’s like, “How did your luggage get here.” And then he’s like “Who touched your luggage since you got here.” “I don’t know, who do you have working for you? I’m not back there…”
Mark: Yea, “We gave you our luggage…”
Carol: You’re just not supposed to mess with these people…
Mike: “Who packed your luggage?” “Yes sir!” “Who touched it last?” “Yes sir!”

Mark: Tell them about customs coming back from canada.
Jenn: Yea, I’ve been pulled over, completely searched…
Carol: You don’t even look like someone that would be searched.
Jenn: I got mouthy. I called her a “dumb redneck”.

Jenn: My passport, I went into Czechoslovakia and Poland and some other countries. so you have to have a visa. and she asks me what the visa says. And I’m like how am I supposed to know what it says?
Carol: Cus it’s in Polish.
Jenn: I know! I’m like, I don’t know… Congratulations… It says in english up at the top “Visa”, and there is a stamp right next to it for in and out of the country. So…. I would think they would have taught you what these means.. and it just escalated, and in the back of my book, there’s a receipt for my video camera, because when you’re traveling through Europe and because of the black market, they can confiscate it and it was a brand new camera! I wasn’t going to take any chances… So it’s been there since like 2000. and she’s giving me a hard time over it it. and I’m all, then tear it out… And it’s from Circuit City so one whole side has no ink on it, it’s just a blank piece of paper… so I pulled in, and she’s like I’m not going to let you in, and I’m like, I’m going to have to walk back…” And that’s great… I mean, I’m very happy in Canada…

Jenn: We’re headed back through customs, and he says, “What do you have?” “A teddy bear.” He says, “That’s all? A teddy bear? You came to Canada, went to Toronto, and all you came back with is a teddy bear?” And I’m like, “Yep.” And I’m showing him this teddy bear.
Mike: “It’s full of cocaine, but it’s a hell of a teddy bear.”

Carol: We went on a trip to Toronto. And before we left, he goes through the entire car with a fine toothed comb making sure there’s no marijuana. So we go to Toronto, stay there for 4 nights, we’re driving back…
Mike: We wanted to get to the duty free before it closes.
Carol: Yea, so we get from Toronto to Windsor in…
Mike: 4 hours…
Carol: Yea, 3 hours. We made some hell of a time…
Mike: But we missed it by a minute.
Carol: Right, just after it closes. So, for some stupid reason, he decides to go through the ash tray on the other side of the border and there’s this roach in there. That he somehow managed to miss.
Mike: I don’t remember that.
Carol: Yea, It just appeared, right?

Speaking of shopping carts… Mike

There’s an ambulance entrance at the GM plant. I’m thinking… If people are getting hurt so often that you need an ambulance entrance… - Mike

Mark: Well, yea, shifting in a smart car…
Mike: Did it take a day to get there?

Carol: Did you become fluent in Danish?
Jenn: I knew it when I was there.
Mike: Did you have it with coffee or on the side…

Jenn: I only require he shaves on weekends.
Carol: Just on weekends.
Jenn: Yes, weekends.
Carol: I’ll make my own conclusions from that.

And you were talking about people writing dissertations on whatever the fuck you were saying… And I heard on the radio a story about how turtles had teeth. Now now, now they have beaks. And, birds have beaks. But, 140 thousand year old birds have teeth. So I’m thinking, somewhere there’s guys writing dissertations on turtle beaks… - Mike

This could all be bullshit, but I heard it on NPR so it must be true. - Mike

Carol: Not agreeing with evolution… I called Cindy’s husband an idiot over that.
Kattni: Well, turns out anyone that would marry Cindy is probably an idiot.

Jenn: We’re not eating at five.
Brian: Supposedly dinner’s at one.
Carol: That’s not five.

Brian: I was a cesarean after 30 some odd hours.
Mark: I was, because, “Hey, that was way easier.”

Carol: So you’ll come again?
Jenn: Yes.
Mike: To return the books.
Jenn: Yes to return the books.
Mike: We’ve got pics that you took them.
Kattni: I didn’t take any pics of that. I’ll delete them if I did…
Mark: Yea, Katt’s pretty good at destroying things
Kattni: Yea, well, just don’t light video tape on fire in your bathroom sink.
Mark: Actually that makes me want to find an old video tape and do it…
Kattni: Well just make sure you have an old toothbrush to go like this to turn on the water. And a good excuse for why the house smells like burnt plastic.
Mark: I pretty much have a free pass on that one.

Mike: Hang a right.
Kattni: Mark, you’re fired, you should know that one.
Mark: Hey, I was following her.
Mike: Yea, you probably usually do…